Marriage Is Not About Your Happiness (Part 3/3)

marriage is not about your happiness

You remember those WWJD bracelets?  Well I am not saying go out and buy one, but burn that into your mind and make that your mantra when it comes to making decisions as a husband.  Just remember: it’s not about you.  That simple shift will revolutionize the way you view your marriage and role in it.  Jesus was a servant king.  He did not come to be served, but to serve and give His life.[1]  That is the call of a husband to his wife.  It’s not about you.

The crazy thing is that it isn’t about your wife either.  It’s all about Jesus.

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Marriage Is Not About Your Happiness (Part 2/3)

marriage is not about your happiness

Have you ever asked people what they think the purpose of marriage is?  You may be surprised at what kind of answers you get.  Look it up on a google search and you find all kinds of answers: “tax breaks”, “to raise a family”, “stability”, and “to keep divorce attorneys making triple digits” are just a few of the answers you will actually find!  One (legitimate) survey was done by the Pew Research Center in July of 2007 that polled over 2,000 random selected participants in the United States and asked them a series of questions about marriage.  Do you know what the #1 answer was for what these randomly selected people was when they asked what the purpose of marriage was?

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Marriage Is Not About Your Happiness (Part 1/3)

marriage is not about your happiness

There is a lot of confusion when it comes to the reason for marriage.  One thing is for sure: marriage is not about your happiness.  If this is the case, then what in the world is the purpose of marriage?  Find out in this three part series that will debunk some common marriage myths and give you insight into the Biblical understanding of marriage.

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Creating A Culture of Appreciation


Everyone wants to be appreciated and get recognition.  It goes back to when you were little and lived for the moment your parent or teacher praised you for something you did right.  And we never really grow out of this; we just mask it better as we get older.  But the truth remains that we all like to be applauded for things we do right.  And this is such a key element in your marriage… creating a culture of appreciation will save you from countless fights and misunderstandings.

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The 100/0 Principle


I have often heard people say “Marriage is 50/50; do your part and you’ll do fine” or even take it a step further and say, “Marriage is not always 50/50.  Some days you will wake up and may have to give 90% and your spouse will give 10%.  Other days you may wake up and give 25% and your spouse will have to put in the 75%.”  And while this may sound good, there is a Kingdom alternative that Jesus espouses that moves beyond the traditional give-and-take approach to marriage.  Let me explain:

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